Sean: (Showing me his Emperor toy.) The Emperor has a big dick.
Me: What?
Sean: The Emperor has a big dick!
Me: Excuse me?
Sean: The Emperor has a big dick!
Me: Um. Sean. Can you please repeat yourself? Slowly?
Sean: The Emperor. has a. big. stick.
Me: OH! STICK! The Emperor has a big stick! Yes. The Emperor has a big stick.
Oh, thank God. I don’t think he knows that word. But with my boys and their apparent penis obsession, I wouldn’t be surprised. The stories I have to write.
That’s one big stick.
