A Biology Lesson or what did you just call it?

Tornado E: I have a penis!


Me: That’s right.  You’re a boy, and boys have penises.


Tornado E: I’m a boy!  I have a penis!  Mommy, you have a penis!


Me: No, Mommy doesn’t have a penis.  Tornado E has a penis.  Mommy is a girl.  She has a vagina.


Tornado E: Mommy has a gina!  I have a gina!


Me: No, you don’t have a vagina.  You’re a boy; you have a penis.  I’m a girl; I have a vagina.


Tornado E: No, I have a gina!  Mommy has a gina!  I have a gina!


Me: You have a penis.  Mommy has a gina.


Tornado E: Mommy has a gina!  I have a gina!


Me: Boys have penises.  You have a penis.


Tornado E: Boys have ginas!  I have a gina. 


Me: (Sigh) You know you have a penis.  You were playing with it today.


Tornado E: I was tickling it.  It’s called a gina!


Me: Boys have penises.  And you know it.  You’re being silly.


Tornado E: No, you’re being silly!


Me: (aha!) No, you’re being silly.


Tornado E: No, you’re being silly!


Me: You’re being funny.


Tornado E: You’re being funny!


Me: I love you.


Tornado E: I love you!


Me: Tornado E is the sweetest boy.


Tornado E: Mommy is the sweetest boy!  And Tornado S is the sweetest baby!


When you’re in the middle of a debate with a toddler, you don’t want to back down because you have a very important point to make.  Sometimes it’s just easier to guide the conversation somewhere else.

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10 Responses to “A Biology Lesson or what did you just call it?”

  1. Not Drowning Mother Says:

    Thanks for the laugh! I love “gina”! It’s instantly solved the whole debate in my head of what to refer to girl’s bits as, since vagina, vulva and punani just don’t have the innocent cuteness that “willy” or “doodah” do.

  2. Nicole Says:

    ugh. i’ve been through this stage twice now, and will have to go through it again with boy #3 in a year or so. i could SO do without this conversation when it starts at my house…but appreciated the laugh!

  3. badmommymoments Says:

    i think you should create a page on here with the title, “the penis monologues” and post links to all of these beneath. keep them all together. they are hilarious.

  4. evenshine Says:

    Hee-larious. I am SO looking forward to the penis monologues.

  5. faemom Says:

    Thankn you all. I never thought boys would be so funny! Especially suring this looooong potty training process. I like the penis monologues idea! You’re so smart, badmommymoments!

  6. sarcasmisonemoreserviceioffer Says:

    Too funny and I love the comment from badmommymoments. The Penis Monologues is a great idea.lol

  7. wild4words Says:

    Here’s mine…

    Bren: MOMMY!! Where’s your penis??!!! (said in a scared voice)
    Mommy: (Thinking to herself that here is one of those moments where I could scar my son for life by saying “OMG!!! Where’d it go?? But instead cooler heads prevail and I say the following…) Mommy is a girl and girls don’t have penis’s.

    And, words I never thought I’d hear myself say EVER: “DO NOT call your brother a penis.”

    I love being a mom to boys…

  8. faemom Says:

    Thanks, Sarcasm.
    Wild4words: That would have been hilarious, except for all the psychological issues. I can’t wait until they use penis as name calling.

  9. holeycheese Says:

    haha. you know this boy and girl and what they have – thing.. is apparently hard to get. Our four-year-old boy is trying to convience me that our baby is a boy because she has short hair. No matter how many people we know that I mention.. boys with long hair – and girls with short hair, and how much I try to tell him what the difference between boys and girls is.. doesn’t help. He still claims our baby girl is a boy. Though I think.. it’s just that he wishes she would be a boy – beacause he wants a brother. 🙂

  10. faemom Says:

    That’s hilarious. I feel for him. I wanted a little sister so bad that when my grandma , who was watching my brother and I, found out it was a boy, she refused to tell me and waited for my dad to break the news. Then I refused to learn his name for months.

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