Learning new words

I’m going to be called in to the principal’s office later this year.  I know it.

 

I recently found out that Evan was calling his Papi “jerk” as a term of endearment.  Apparently, Evan heard his grandma calling Papi that and automatically assumed it was a pet name.  That it is for my mom is not the issue.  The fact is my son has learned the word jerk.

Ms. Principal, I would like to introduce my mother, who is responsible for Evan’s language.

 

To make matters worse, I caught Evan saying the f-word.  He was upset, and it popped out of his mouth.  The world went silent as my brain try to understand what exactly happened. 

When I finally recovered my wits, I took Evan aside and explained how that was a bad word, that we have so many good words to use that we didn’t need to say it, and how we should never use words we don’t know what they mean.

Last weekend, Evan told us that his daddy wasn’t nice.

The Husband was hurt by this and wanted to know why.  I can list off a whole list of broken promises, refusals on childish demands, the rare spankings. 

Evan told us in his quietest voice that Daddy wasn’t nice because he said f-.

While my husband sat there astonished by the turn of events, I was ecstatic.  Evan understood that using that word was a poor choice.

Then Evan used it yesterday.

Ms. Principal, I would like to introduce the boy’s father, who is responsible for Evan’s colorful language.

 

Last weekend we were at an adult party, which we stopped in for an hour with the kids because we had no babysitter in CA.  The boys amused the adults with songs, conversations, and games.

As I talked to another woman, Sean pointed to a dog figurine and said “A damn dog!”

Crap.

I tried to ignore it, hoping that he spoke in toddler-speak.

Instead, the woman looked at me and asked, “Did he just say what I thought he said?”

I nodded.

She, being a mother as well, nodded and said, “The Husband.”

Not ten minutes later, Evan said, “Where’s the damn ball?”

Double crap.

Another discussion of bad words versus good words.

 

Maybe I should just send The Husband to explain the language problem.

 

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19 Responses to “Learning new words”

  1. ymK Says:

    I think we should send all men to some Dad-language camp before they become dads.
    My 4-year old asked her little sister one day, ‘who’s the f-ing man she was waving to from the car. And the worse thing is, she wasn’t saying it angrily, but matter-of-factly.

  2. insider53 Says:

    It is a dilemma. Do as I say not as I do. Explain that these are grown up words and he can’t use them until he is grown up. Lame I know but it is the best I got.

  3. TheKitchenWitch Says:

    I’m laughing! I shouldn’t though, because I have the mouth of a sailor and I know that one of these days, a blue streak is going to come out of one of the girls’ mouths.

    I do recall, at age 5, strolling into the kitchen and asking my mother: “Mom, what is a goddamnedsonofabitch?”

    My father was putting a bbq together in the garage. Obviously, it wasn’t going well.

  4. ck Says:

    My dad was a make-your-own curse word expert. One of my youngest brother’s first words was f*ck and needless to say my mom put my dad on a verbal diet after that. He did pretty good, as long as he wasn’t driving…

  5. The mommy Says:

    I am sure that the bonky will be saying shit and f- by the end of the year. Who will I blame? The daddy!

  6. Freedom Debt Relief Says:

    You know very well that we cannot handle such situations as meeting the principal as good as you could manage 😉 as for the kids learning bad language we are to be blamed alright… i try my best never to use those words not just in home but outside too, because it is almost impossible not to use these words in home if we do not do the same outside.

  7. joz1234 Says:

    LOL! Definitely send Daddy on this one! 😀

  8. Gibby Says:

    ROFL! Hilarious!!! I know I’ve said this before, but I love when little kids swear. It’s so freaking funny!

    (I know, I know, it’s like I am 10 or something…)

  9. beth aka confusedhomemaker Says:

    I plan on blaming the Husband but really I slip too. I dread the day I have to have a chit-chat with one of the teachers or principal, I keep praying it doesn’t happen or that they’ll be smarter than us & know not to use it at school.

  10. Country-Fried Mama Says:

    We have cleaned up our language immensely since having kids, but I probably slip up more than my husband. My meeting with the principal is certainly coming.

  11. faemom Says:

    ymk~ Stupid matter-of-fact cussing. It’s like it’s already apart of their language.
    insider~ It’s all lame. No matter what I tell him,he’ll eventurally realize it’s lame.
    TKW~ At least, she asked you what it meant.
    ck~ Funny, I do well too, as long as I’m not driving. Is it wrong that Evan thinks morons look like cows?
    The Mommy~ I shall ALWAYS blame daddy for these things.
    FDR~ I’ll assure you that I started to worry about this when Evan was just happily swimming inside me, so I had things pretty under control by the time he showed up because you’re right. Outside makes it easier for the slip inside.
    joz~ Thanks for the extra vote.
    Gibby~ More like nine.
    beth~ I have a horrible feeling that they learned the “damn” from me, but I’ll never admit it.
    CFM~ Ok, first one called into the office owes the other mother a drink and a word by word replay.

  12. Old Mum Says:

    Yeah, when asked by the minister how she liked the church service, my then 5 year old said “Oh, I had a hell of a good time.” Kids…

  13. jlewicky Says:

    When Kate was two, she dropped an aluminum pan in the play kitchen and said “F***!!!” That’s when I knew I (unfortunately not the Husband) had a problem.

    However, if Jon were to say the word, and use it correctly, I think I’d do cartwheels. 🙂 I’d still end up in the principal’s office, of course.

  14. faemom Says:

    Old Mum~ That’s sort of thing that makes you never want to go back to church.
    jlewicky~ Maybe you do cartwheels all the way to the principal’s office; it might ease the pain of going.

  15. jlewicky Says:

    That would be quite a sight! Easing the pain until I broke a hip!

  16. faemom Says:

    Then you would have to limp into the office. Maybe the principal wouldn’t be so hard on you if you were handicapped.

  17. jlewicky Says:

    Yeah, we all know how understanding the schools can be about handicaps 🙂

  18. faemom Says:

    *nod* Well, unless you go to a conservative school; then they’re all not caring. Hopefully he goes to a bleeding-heart liberal. Ooo, then you could claim family dysfunction on the incident and get free counceling for the family. I think we got a plan.

  19. jlewicky Says:

    I always knew you were an evil genius. You and I together, we could rule the world! bwaaaa haa haa


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