Berry Pie

Let’s go over this again.  How many pregnancies have we been through together?

Two.

So really you should know by now when I ask with a manic glint in my eyes for something specific, like a berry pie.  I mean a berry pie.  I would settle for a cobbler or a tart.  But I NEED the berries and the crust and NOTHING else.  It’s not my fault.  I’m not usually like this.  Sure, when I send you out for dessert, I expect something with chocolate, but you don’t understand that because you’re not a big chocolate guy.  I settle for what you bring.  Except when I’m pregnant.

So when you rush out to bring me my berry pie, I’m grateful.

But don’t get hurt when I look crushed, when I start to cry, when I see that you brought me a fresh fruit tart . . . with kiwi with the berries . . . with cream . . . with a crust that isn’t quite like a pie crust.  I know you tried.  I know you searched.  But I also know when I mentioned the frozen dessert section as a second resort that you waved me off saying you’ll just go to the pie section.

Don’t laugh when I start to cry in disappointment.  I’m emotional and irrational, and I cry at the drop of a hat.  I’m pregnant!  You try growing a baby, having your body morph in strange ways, be a washed in a sea of hormones.  See how normal you are.

Yes, you did the right thing bringing me a slice of tart to try since I ran away in tears, softly closing the bedroom door when I wanted to slam it (but the boys were sleeping). 

But don’t act hurt that I’m crying.  Of course, I’m going to yell at you.  I just vomited a bit because I started coughing because I was crying.  I can’t even have a good refreshing cry without that stupid cough making me more miserable.  I’m trying not to lose my dinner here with all those healthy vegetables and milk.   

Yes, I’m a big enough person to admit that I’m emotional and appreciative and that I shouldn’t have snapped at you.

But don’t act like I’m a basket case as I whip up a small berry crumble.  I would have done it before if I had the almonds I like using to make a bottom crust.  Yes, I’ll stay up late enjoying it.  Yes, the tart was fine.  You can have as much as you like.  You know what would go great with this crumble?  Vanilla ice cream.  No, we don’t have any.  But I know the stores aren’t closed yet.

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7 Responses to “Berry Pie”

  1. TheKitchenWitch Says:

    Oh, sweetie. They just don’t get it, do they?

  2. zeemaid Says:

    awww… this is why junior with Arnold Schwart….. is my one of my fav movies… you finally get to see a guy be all irrational and hormonal!!!

    I hope your crumble was delish!!!

  3. Evenshine Says:

    One of your best rants yet. HUGS!

  4. Coco Says:

    I totally know what you mean and I would have cried too. The little fetus wants what it wants, and NO, a tart is NOT the same or even close.

    Hope you ate every bit of that crumble and smiled the whole time!

  5. theycallmejane Says:

    Awwww…I wish I could send over every kind of berry pie I can think of. They’re cravings for a reason – and nothing else ever satisfies. I’d stash a couple frozen alternatives in the freezer for the next time!

  6. Fie Upon This Quiet Life Says:

    Oh my GOD! I am right there with you. Why can’t someone understand that when you’re pregnant, you MUST have that one particular craving or it’s all over? At 35 weeks pregnant, I am RIGHT there with you. (Now, I am going to go to the store myself to pick up a Hostess Cherry Pie — not even going to trust hubby to do it.)

  7. faemom Says:

    TKW~ No. They do. Not.
    zeemaid~ It lacked the usual almonds, but it hit the spot, which is most important. And guys are irrational and homonal; they just are never called on it. (Like the joke women would start a war over PMS; yeah, like Hitler had a great excuse? Whatever.)
    Evenshine~ Thank you. I’m trying to match the best.
    Coco~ Especially when it’t not even a fruit tart but a creme tart with fruit on top. I hardly waited for tbe crumble to cool.
    jane~ Great idea! A guy told me he “encouraged” his wife to look beyond the craving. You want ice cream; it means you need milk. I said, no, it means you need ice cream. Men.
    FUTQL~ Smart move. I once took hunted down a strawberry pie because I NEEDED one NOW.


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