Toy of Destruction

I like buying toys for people.  Not just kids, but people.  I have a long-held belief that everyone loves toys and wish to have an excuse to play like they did as children.  Some people appreciate this; some think it’s pretty weird.  Obviously I buy more toys for the people who appreciate this unique belief of mine.  Like my dad.

Some time in high school, I started buying my dad police toys for Christmas.  Not every Christmas, just every other one.  I would find the most interesting, possibly loudest police toy I could find and present it to my dad.  He in return would take it to the obvious to annoy people when he needed a laugh.  It worked out well.

Until I had boys.

Until my dad retired.

Bringing home all those loud cop toys.

The first one was a motorcycle with lights and sound, even drove by itself, that my dad “accidentally” left at my house.  “But my grandsons enjoy it so much.”  Um, thanks.

Then yesterday my dad showed Tornado E a police car that activated with a clicker or any loud noise.  The thing would turn on its lights and siren and drive in some random direction.  If it was stuck on something when activated, it would just go backwards.  Another click or loud noise, the car shuts down.  Very clever little toy.  Except ANY loud noise activates it.

Any loud noise.  Like a clap.  A snap.  A stomp.  A yell.  A song.  Talking. TV.  A YELL.

And sometimes it doesn’t go off.  It just goes and goes and goes and goes.

I’ll tell you one thing.  It’s going back to Grandma and Papi’s.

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10 Responses to “Toy of Destruction”

  1. Coco Says:

    GAHHHH! The evil self-activating toys! Oh, how I fear them.

  2. Court Says:

    My dad is awful about this… he used to break our toys when he was the parent and now as the grandparent he purposefully tries to find the loudest things possible. argh!

  3. suzicate Says:

    Gotta love Grampas…this could be filed under things that come back to bite you in the butt! I used to buy those kind of toys for my sisters kids. Then I had kids and she got revenge!

  4. Ink Says:

    We had one like that. It lived in the garage, going off randomly, until the battery ran out. And then we pitched it when no one was looking!

  5. Jane Says:

    Lol! This is too funny! My sister (childless) does this, too. Is so generous with giving toys – and the more obnoxious, the better!

  6. Maureen@IslandRoar Says:

    Karma may be a bitch, but nobody should torture a pregnant mom!

  7. Gibby Says:

    Oh Fae, I’m sorry…

    I can’t stop laughing!!!!!!!!! If it makes you feel better, my husband once bought a toy jackhammer for a family friend. I am terrified that it will end up back in our house one day.

  8. Country-Fried Mama Says:

    We have a puzzle that randomly makes noises if the pieces are not set in place PERFECTLY. I would really love to blame this horrid toy on a family member, but, um, I’m the one who went out and bought it. Rookie mistake.

  9. ck Says:

    “Until I had kids…”

    I don’t think there’s a better phrase to separate the before/after child views of life. I was always careful to get people nice things for their kids but was repaid with loud, obnoxious gifts. My friends without kids know they have it coming though…

  10. faemom Says:

    Coco~ I never knew this kind of fear before.
    Court~ What’s up with dads?
    suzicate~ I’m planning the same revenge on my brothers.
    Ink~ I like the thought of living out in the garage.
    Jane~ And of course, your kids LOVE those toys so much that they can’t disappear.
    Maureen~ My dad is an artist at torture. He knows how far to push the envelope and still know that he’s on my good side.
    Gibby~ And where does one find a toy jackhammer?
    CFM~ We have those toys too!! I’ve learned they work much better without batteries 😉
    ck~ Sometimes it helps to plot revenge as the toy goes off and off and off again.

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