Am I beautiful?

Yesterday Tornado E got into my makeup.  Which really is a little more difficult than it sounds.  Since we have a tiny bathroom, The Husband and I have one drawer each, and yes, I did take the biggest drawer; I have more stuff.  But I couldn’t fit the makeup in the drawer too, which I don’t usually wear but I have tons of eye shadow and body glitter, so I have it in one of those plastic makeup boxes all teen girls had to have in the 90s, and it’s on a shelf in the closet.

Tornado E pulled out the box and found a set of girl lipsticks featuring Strawberry Shortcake.

(Why I have Strawberry Shortcake lipsticks is a long story.  Ok, here it goes.  I’m cursed to have all lip balm I love be discontinued after a year or so of buying them, using them, and devoting my loyalty to them.  Then it takes me months to find a replacement lip balm and the cycle begins again.  In between such cycles, I fell in love with the Angel Cake Strawberry Shortcake lip balm, which tasted and smelled like having sugar on my lips.  For a sugar addict such as myself, I was in heaven.  But then I couldn’t find them anymore, so I bought the fake lipstick, which wasn’t right at all, so I put them up for when our friends’ daughters come over they could play with them.  I’m obviously watching too much Phineas and Ferb and slowly becoming Dr. Doofenshmirtz with this kind of back story issue.)

Since he found the box during the end of rest time, where they may have gotten up from their naps but I place the boys in front of the TV to give them three full hours of rest and I three full hours of blogging, I didn’t realize what Tornado E was into, until he came to find me.

Tornado E: Mommy!  Mommy!  Look at me!  Am I beautiful?

I turn around and found that Tornado E’s whole mouth was covered in pink.

Me: Maybe you should use the mirror to put it on.

Tornado S: Brother!  Brother!  Let me see!

Tornado E: See, Tornado S!  Would you like some?
Tornado S: Yes!

Tornado E took Tornado S to the bathroom and plied purple lipstick.

Tornado S: Mommy!  Mommy!  Do I look bootiful?

Me: Yes, you do.

Tornado E: How about me, Mommy?!  Do I look beautiful?

Me: Yes, you do.

Tornado E: Mommy has two beautiful boys.  Let’s go get more.

This carried on for a half an hour or so of smearing more lipstick on and running to ask me if they were beautiful.

And what was the first thing Tornado E did when he got up?  Put on his lipstick, of course.

I’m completely fine with this.

As long as he doesn’t turn into that serial killer from Silence of the Lambs.  That guy was creepy.  And no one tell The Husband or he’ll torture me with his impression of “It puts the lotion on its skin.”  God, that sends chills of my spine.

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12 Responses to “Am I beautiful?”

  1. Country-Fried Mama Says:

    Your boys are awesome…and so bootiful.

  2. jc Says:

    They need their own drawer and some nail polish! But hide your eyelash torture device.

  3. ck Says:

    You know my girls would love to give your kids a make-over. They’re very generous with compliments…and my make-up.

  4. Jane Says:

    This is too cute! My husband would freak if the boys did this and me? I’d take pictures! (I hope YOU did!)

  5. Ink Says:


    (And LMAO at the Silence reference.)

  6. itneverrainsinseattle Says:


    The references to Silence of the Lambs not withstanding, you and your boys all sound beautiful.

  7. femspotter Says:

    I used to put makeup on my little brother and he turned out fine. At least, I don’t think he’s a serial killer. 😉 That does sound fun! And they’re too young to know that society at large isn’t very tolerant about men wearing makeup; maybe by the time they’re out in the world, the world will have changed.

  8. faemom Says:

    CFM~ They are, aren’t they?
    jc~ That’s a great idea, especially since Evan told me anything in his bathroom is his. Including the themometer.
    ck~ Then we could roll our eyes together, and instead of awkward silence, I’ll apoligize and offer to buy you more make up.
    Jane~ Damnit, Jane. I completely forgot, but since Evan has now confiscated the lipstick, I think I have another shot.
    Ink~ Anything for a laugh.
    INRIS~ Thanks. What the hell are you doing up so late?
    femspotter~ I assure you, I didn’t make them feel uncomfortable, and when I told The Husband over the phone, he seemed amused. I think we had a break through.

  9. Gibby Says:

    That is awesome! (And my girls would be so jealous of your Strawberry Shortcake lip balm.)

  10. faemom Says:

    Gibby, you’re welcome to come over and bring the girls any time.

  11. Brian Says:

    I truly enjoyed reading through this article.Thank you.

  12. redell09 Says:

    haha, this is so much better than what i did as a dad was adamantly against beauty products as all fathers of 5 year olds probably are and of course i had that one aunt who didnt care and supplied me with make up , nail polish, and body glitters anyway.
    so my father hid them.
    and as ive always been good at, i simply thought like the man, and found the make up. except i found red nail polish. and i wanted blush. so i used it the same way.
    long story short there was a lot of yelling and crying and i had rather red cheeks anyway for a day or so from harsh scrubbing.

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