I’m ready for the baby. I’m tired of waiting. I want to get this over and done with. Let’s roll.
But in reality, I’m not. There’s no way I’m ready.
I’ve never been inpatient for a baby to be born before this. With both Tornado E and Tornado S, when people asked if I was ready, if I couldn’t wait, I would pat my bulging tummy and say, “Not yet.” But rather than feel like I could wait until everything was perfectly ready to the point of refusing to believe those are actually labor pains, I feel like saying “Just give me the baby already.”
First off, there are the medical issues of having a preemie. I am more than happy to wait and let the kid cook at his own rate. Now I would feel guilty for every minute I devoted to the hospital and not with the other boys. Time management would be a huge issue. That doesn’t mean if the little character came early that I wouldn’t be done there every second I could. I just would worry about the boys during such an issue.
Second, the house is no where ready. We’ve decided to stay with our little rental for another year, saving money for a potential house purchase next year. Now we have to reorganize the master to accommodate a new little guy. Thank God it’s a master suite, something The Husband and I didn’t like originally. We have to pull out all the baby stuff from the garage and my parents’ house. Not to mention, I really would like our carpets and furniture cleaned and a half of dozen other things that would be nice to have done before the little tike comes to take all our time and energy.
Third, I have to buy stuff for the baby. Our diaper bag is on its last legs, even though The Husband keeps trying to convince me that we could pull it out for another baby. Um, no. I don’t want a hole in it. I have to buy Tornado E a booster seat, so the baby can have his. Heck, the water proof pad for the basinet is under Tornado S’s sheets, so I need one of those. Not to mention, I need to get us a little more organized so I’ll need more racks and stuff. Yeah, I have a list.
Fourth, we don’t even have a name yet! Sure, The Husband has all sorts of names picked out, but there’s not one that sounds just right. Nor have I really looked. Two kids, a house, a blog, and now a Farmville Farm (completely not my fault, I’m doing it only for my mom), I just never seem to have time to read, much less look for names. Maybe I should do a contest?
So with all those reasons, why the hell am I “ready” for this baby? Why do I feel like I’m waiting around for the main event? Hell, I’m in complete denial for the first hours of labor because I’m so NOT ready. So why do I feel ready now?
Maybe I really have flipped.