1. I’m losing night shirts with Tornado A because he steals them because he loses the ones he had the night before to sleep with.
2. Tornado E has his home run trot down; now to teach him to hit the home run before he learns about tagging a slow runner out.
3. Tornado S can explain Star Wars movies that he hasn’t even seen yet. Is that some sort of genius ability?
4. Why is there a silhouette of a woman running in a skirt and heels on the packaging of maxi-pads? I’m assuming she forgot her maxi-pads.
5. My boys are drawing mustaches on their faces as I write this.
6. Last Friday I took the boys, by myself, to a restaurant. Everyone ate. Everyone came home. And I didn’t have to threaten dropping them off at a corner somewhere.
7. Correction. My boys are coloring their whole faces and bodies with markers.
8. I see the sense of keeping a child home fever-free for 24 hours, but my child’s fevers are psychosomatic. And now I have him home. Coloring himself with markers. Coloring his brother’s hair with markers.
9. I recommend writing to your elected officials when you want to pick on someone. It’s fun.
10. And I totally got to see the movie I wanted to see. With someone. In the theaters. That was awesome.