The Last Day of School

Tornado E “graduated” kindergarten.  (Am I the only mom who smirks when she says that? {Note to self: Post on why I’m a bad mom})  The ceremony was cute, just like the other millions of kindergarten graduation ceremonies are.  I did have a tearing moment as I watched my boy present facts on eels (They grow to 11 feet long.  They have nostrils.  They have two pairs of jaws.),  realizing I was his biggest fan and always would be.  Though I did learn a lesson, never make faces at the performers.

Afterwards one of the moms hosted an End of the Year party at the closest park.  She originally planned to have it at her community pool.  I had suggested we pool our money together and hire a lifeguard because I’m all about safety.  Some of the moms weren’t into it because their kids could swim, but I’m a big fan of covering bases and believed there were too many kids not to have a designated watcher, swimmers or not.  One mom was enthusiastic about the idea because she didn’t want to wear a swimsuit (Roll eyes now) and was willing to pay more to get out of wearing one.

Sunday, my friend messaged me in a panic because the community pool was shut down for health code violations.  She was livid because she had told her HOA two weeks ago about the pool being weird and that she was throwing a party there.  She was freaking out because the party was Tuesday.  After a quick debate on Facebook for all to see, we decided on the park with squirt guns, buckets, and those squishy balls that soak up water.

While commenting back and forth with my friend, it occurred to me that the mom who didn’t want to wear the swimsuit was able to read the comments.  I HAD to make the suggestion of dumbing a bucket of water on said mom.  My friend just HAPPENED to respond with “She could always pay us off not to throw a bucket of water on her.”  So the banter went on all the way through Tuesday.

At the party, I casually dropped hints of the imminent bucket dropping, and my friend dropped hints on the monetary value of said bucket dropping and how we needed to fund the next Mom’s Night Out or, better still, Mom’s Weekend.

As we were packing up, I dumbed out the ice and snagged a piece.  Of course, the mom in question saw me so I held onto the ice as I put away my ice chest, letting the cool water drip out of my hands.  As I returned back to the ramada, I noticed that she had her back to me as she was cleaning up one of the tables.  I stalked through the gravel, placing my feet for maximum silence, placing my feet in the way that my sandals wouldn’t flip or flop.  I snuck up and slid the ice down her shirt.  I jumped away as she shrieked and turned around.

I made a miscalculation.  Because she turned with a glass in each hand.  I saw her look down as I turned to run.  I didn’t run fast enough as I was coated with ice water.  Crap.

As funny as that was, that wasn’t the best part.  Maybe it was when one of the dads, a firefighter, called his brother, another firefighter, who sent down a truck to spray the kids.  Or maybe it was when one of my friends made a squiter out of a two-liter and tried to get her husband.  Or maybe it was when he grabbed the squirter and twisted it as she squeezed, soaking herself.  Or when the husband ran and grabbed Tornado A as a human shield.  Or when she used me as a distraction and got him in the back.  Or when one of the moms covered my boys in sunscreen because they looked like they were getting red.  Or one of the many times a parent would hold on to Tornado A as he walked around.  Or it might have surrounded the yummy pasta salad.  Or when one of the moms suggested we all go camping and everyone looked at me and I shrugged and said why not.

But I think the best part was as each mom left, we parted like we were in high school separating for summer and then college. “Call me!”  “I’m going to miss you!” “We have to stay in touch!”  “We have to do something soon!”  “We have to get together sometime this summer!”  “We should go to the movies!”  “I don’t know what I’ll do being with the kids (of course in high school it was parents) all day!”  “Let’s make plans!”  “Everyone should come to my house sometime!”

If we had yearbooks, we totally would have been in high school.  (Hmmm, not a bad idea.  A year book for the moms . . . .  I wonder how much they would pay NOT to have certain photos in there.)

As one of my friends left with her family, I yelled her name and then made a motion of typing on a phone with my thumbs.

Friend: OK!

Me: Wait!  What is the universal sign for texting?!

Friend: I think you just did it!

Me: Well, that’s lame!  We need a new one!

Friend: We’ll figure it out next time we’re together!

Me: Thursday?!



See, the summer is shaping up nicely.

Of course this was her text sent last night at 11pm.  “Then I think ‘the kids are home from school.. I don’t have to take them to school in the morning.. yeay!’.. Then I also realize no more 2 hours alone by myself for the rest of the summer.. (I weep silently into my pillow..)”

It’s a going to be a great summer.

What a minute?!  You get two hours to yourself every day!?  WTH?!


3 Responses to “The Last Day of School”

  1. Karyn @ kloppenmum Says:

    As kiwi kids only ever graduate from university, I have to admit to a bit of smirking to kindergarten graduations too. Sounds like the Mums had the most fun! Enjoy your holidays. 🙂

  2. Elastamom Says:

    That sounds like a lot of fun. I would also like 2 hours a day to myself!

  3. rakster Says:


    congrats on making it through: the graduation; the first day of holidays…

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