Keep Calm and Carry On

It was suppose to be a quick run to Target for dish detergent (because if I have to wash more than a sinkful of dishes a night, I will kill something), sunscreen (because, you know, the blistering lecture about skin cancer I got from the doctor), and Diet Cherry Pepsi (because I need caffeine in a sweeten syrup form and as an adult, I have realized that I can no longer avoid the effects of regular soda, stupid metabolism).  And by quick, I mean get three kids out of the car, lead them in the store, tell them no for every item that crosses their fancy, usher them through the store, and tell them not to touch stuff or each other.  Naturally Tornado A was in the cart, trying to stand up and practice surfing.  Tornado E was curled under the cart against my warnings.  Tornado S decided he was too tired to walk and must ride in the cart.  I handed him the heavy box of detergent.

A young mother with wispy brown hair pushed a half-full cart into the aisle.  Her son looked as old as Tornado A.  He was her first because he was strapped in, and she was smart because he had a binky in his mouth and a toy in hand.  She stopped and looked at me.  With the survivor’s look.

She:(in an Eastern European accent) How do you do it?  I mean, (she gestured to my full cart of boys) how do you do it?  I’m going crazy with one.

Me: (I gave her a reassuring smile.) You put your head down and just do.

She: (shaking her head) How do you not go crazy?  Three boys.  I can’t do it with one.

Me: It’s all a phase.  He will grow and change.  And every time you will pick up your stride.  You will be fine.

She sighed and shook her head in disbelief.  I smiled.  She kept going her way, and I went on mine, hoping she will just breathe and realize she was doing just fine.

Later, I realized I just gave out some parenting advice.  Holy crap!  Everyone should be worried that I’m handing out parenting advice because I’m freakin’ worried I’m handing out parenting advice.

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9 Responses to “Keep Calm and Carry On”

  1. pamelazimmer Says:

    I really love your style of writing, and I can totally relate to the “quick trip” to the store, although I only have 2 boys and I am stopping at that. Looking forward to reading more…

  2. zeemaid Says:

    Hellooooo, you’re raising three wonderful outgoing, energetic, creative, witty, imaginative, zany, kind and insightful little boys. Not to mention,you are surviving parent hood… Obviously you are doing something right!!!

  3. unicorn Says:

    If you’re still standing, you’re more than qualified to advise others.

    “he was strapped in” LOL. If he ain’t dangling from the back of the cart, she might be soon.

  4. Elastamom Says:

    That’s such a nice compliment, really! Very good advice because that’s what we all do, right?

  5. faemom Says:

    pamelazimmer~ You may be a smarter woman than I.
    zeemaid~ Let’s wait until they all make it to adulthood without an arrest.
    unicorn~ That poor mother.
    Elastamom~ Yup. Luckily, I hear we all look back and think it was an awesome time.

  6. Ink Says:

    You SHOULD be handing out parenting advice because you rock.

  7. beth confusedhomemaker Says:

    Of course you gave great advice, you are doing a great job 🙂

  8. faemom Says:

    Ink~ Thanks. You’re so kind.
    beth~ Thanks but let’s wait to see if any of the kids go to juvy.

  9. Kat Says:

    Girl you know you are my go to for parenting advise. When it is 12am and the baby is screaming I know Faemom will be there to hold my hand and get me through it. I know when it looks weird or smells weird to call Faemom and she will tell me if it is “normal” or not. When I read on the Babycenter.com about how all the babies are sleeping through the night,rolling over and “talking” already and mine is doing NONE of these things. I know to call Faemom because she will reassure me that my little one isn’t even 3 months yet and he is happy, normal, and perfectly advanced for his age.


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