So the other day, we were having dinner when Tornado S popped up with some news.
Tornado S: I learned the sign language sign for penis!
Me: Oh? And what is it?
Tornado S made the gesture. It was not the sign for penis. In fact, it was a sign for a sexual act. One so taboo that most people don’t do it often.
Me: That’s not the sign for penis, sweetheart. Where did you learn that?
Right away Tornado S sensed something was wrong and clammed up.
Me: I would like to know where you learned that.
He shook his head.
Me: No dessert then.
Tornado S: Fine.
Me: No video games either.
Tornado S: NO!
Me: Then just tell me where you learned it. No one will get in trouble.
But it was no use.
After a day went by, I realized I had to try a different strategy. But I also needed to move up The Talk by a month because I couldn’t have Tornado S repeating the gesture.
Me: Tornado S, do you know what that sign means?
Tornado S: No. Tell me.
Me: Tell me who showed you.
Tornado S: No.
Me: (sigh) Fine. But I’ll have to contact your teacher, your den leader, and your sensei.
Tornado S: No! Why?!
Me: Because the gesture you used is a grown up gesture that is so taboo that most people don’t use it. Nana has never seen it. Papi has seen it a couple of times. (Though I thought that was weird from a cop.) The adults around you need to know that other children may be using the sign without knowing what it means, and their parents need to know to help teach their kids what it means.
Tornado S: (whispering) I learned it at school.
Tornado S: During the Valentine’s Party.
So it was a while ago.
Me: From who?
He was silent.
Me: Fine. Do you want to know what it means?
Tornado S: Yes.
Me: Well, first we have to talk about puberty and sexual intercourse.
So we had The Talk. When it was time to generically explain the sex act, Tornado E was walking by, so I pulled him to the room and explained what a sex act was and that the gesture was a sex act on a woman. I showed them a diagram of a woman’s sexual organs. Tornado E nodded and left the room.
Tornado S hid under my ultra soft through for twenty minutes refusing to get out or talk.
I took pictures.