We’ve learned to strip Tornado S of his swimsuit immediately after he swims. Or else he walks over to the grass and pees in his swim trunks. Tornado S stood on the pool decking, naked, shivering in the wind, waiting for Uncle M to climb out of the pool after he fetched all the diving toys the boys let drop in the deep end. My brother looked at Tornado S and then at me.
Uncle M: Hey, Fae! I can tell when Tornado S’s cold.
Me: From his shivering?
Uncle M: No.
Me: From the bright blue color of the scar on his lip.
Uncle M: Nope. His penis is totally blue.
Who doesn’t rush over to see a blue penis?
Papi: Well, we now know he’s pick up line in college. Girls, have you ever seen a blue penis?
Papi: Or. Some guys get blue balls, but I get a blue penis.
Me: (roll of eyes and groan) You know this is going to go in the blog.
Papi: Or. Gu-
Uncle M: Tornado E! No! We don’t touch people’s penises.
Tornado E: But I want to see it!
Me: Tornado E, we don’t touch some one else’s penis. Even if we want to look at it. Here, Tornado S. (I wrapped Tornado S in a towel and carried him in the house.)
Papi: Ok, how about this one? –
I slammed the back door shut.