The Director

Sean is insistent.  He’s persistent.  He’s down right stubborn.  And he likes to be read to.


Sean will find a book that he wants read to him, and he then tottles over to his Mommy or Daddy with a sweet, “Peeease!”  Now if said person isn’t paying attention, Sean will take his/her hand and jam the book into it with a sweet but persistent, “Peeease!”


After the parent is finished reading the book, Sean opens the book, saying “Peeease!”  After the thirtieth reading, the parent tries to do something else, like watch TV or have an adult conversation, but Sean will take the parent’s hand again, jamming the book back into the hand with a very insistent “Peeease!” 


Now let’s just say that about the forty-third time, I’m not reading it with as much enthusiasm as the little director would like.  Sean will yank the book out of my hand and read it allowed to me.  “Mawaweey.  Kuamuama.  Twany.”  Then he will hand it back, expecting more feeling, and amazingly he’ll get it. 



Vote for my post on Mom Blog Network

Story time and the Angels?

As I had nothing really to write about, I decided to take the boys to story time today.  I figured we hadn’t been there in a while, and if I let the boys loose in a place where they are suppose to sit still and be quiet, hilarity would follow.  Just like any comedy sitcom writer, I added a little chaos to a normal mix.  And you know what?  The boys were as good as gold.  Are you kidding?  I needed them to act up or else what would I write about.  How Evan sat still and sang along with all the songs or how Sean managed to pay attention for 18 minutes before becoming antsy?  Great post.


After the morning struggle of getting Evan dressed, who insisted he could be naked, forgetting penis rule number 3 (You may not be naked in public.), I got everyone buckled in the car on time.  You can imagine how amazed I was when I turned the car on to see the time, even with Sean wrestling against the seat belt.  We made great time to the library (because we all know when you’re late that’s when the lights work against you).  We ate our morning snack outside the library around the water fountain.  We entered the library with Sean and me following Evan.  They were so orderly, neither one darting toward some shiny object.  I was the mother of two little angels.


As soon as we were in the children’s section, they took off to see the animals poking out from the walls. Evan wandered over to the puzzles, and Sean made a bee line for the computers.  But when they announced story time, the boys followed me into the reading room without an argument, a fight, or a cry.  It all seemed surreal. 


Story time was going along well.  Sean passed Evan’s mark of paying attention at that age.  Evan would only sit for 15 minutes in the beginning; Sean paid attention a whole 18 minutes.  This was when the toddler to our right was starting to get out of control by slithering in front of Sean and towards the librarian. 


Now I know I have said this before, but it’s worth repeating, if nothing else, for my sake to get it off my chest.  Please parents of toddlers control your kids.  I don’t care how you do it.  Pacifiers, snacks, drinks, candy, anything to keep your kid from disrupting the class.  WE are all having a difficult time.  Look around you.  We’re whispering, congratulating, consoling, bribing our kids to stay still.  But the moment you let your kid crawl around, run around, or go up to the librarian to touch the book is the moment we start losing our battle.  It becomes MUCH harder for the rest of us to keep our kids under control as yours has up the anti.  So please, for us parents, for the librarian, for you, control your kid.


Because I had not been to story time in a while, I was surprised when the librarian announced a craft.  A what?  There are no tables; what are you putting us parents through?  It turns out it was a coloring sheet that Evan and Sean were just dying to color.  When Sean finally finished his, we left with our hands stamps.  Due to the pleading of Evan, we stayed to do another puzzle as I itched to go upstairs and get the books I looked up before we came.  I’m a good mom.


818.  That was the section.  It held some of the books that Caitlin Flanagan read for her book The Hell with All That: blah, blah, blah.  I couldn’t wait to get to the books, hoping for some insight, some sanity to Flanagan.  I figured they would be interesting reads because one of the authors was Shirley Jackson from “The Lottery” fame.  As I told Evan that he had to finish his puzzle, I saw him grab his crotch.  Oh, no.  Oh, no.  Oh, God, not here, not now.  And sure enough, he started peeing as I looked around for the bathroom that was on the other side of the library.  As I whispered and begged for Evan to try to stop, it did no good.  All I could do was shift him to dribble on his shoe any urine that wasn’t soaked up by shorts, underwear, and shirt.  Then I rushed the boys out the door as Evan asked to go up the stairs, up the elevator, look at books, throw pennies in the fountain.  No, no, no, no.  No, because you didn’t tell me you needed to go potty and now we have to change you, and you don’t have extra socks.


Well, they do have another story time for pre-schoolers tomorrow.  Maybe we’ll go there too.

Storytime at Dinnertime

Evan: Mommy, I like snakes.  Can you tell me a story about snakes?


Me: Yes, just give me a second to finish cutting up Seanny’s steak.  Ok,  Once upon a time there were three snakes.


Evan: No, no, Mommy, not three snakes.  How about one snake?  Ok, three snakes.


Me: Once upon a time there were three snakes, and they were best friends. 


Evan: No, not friends.  Ok, best friends.


Me: And one day they decided to go out on an adventure.  Where did they go?  (To the zoo or Disneyland)


Evan: They were going to Halloween.  They needed costumes.  And Mommy Snake went to get them costumes.  They needed costumes.  Mommy Snake bought them costumes.


Me: What was the first snake?


Evan: It was a witch!


Me: What was the second snake?


Evan: It was a ghost!


Me: What was the third snake?


Evan: I don’t know.  It was a Halloween pumpkin!


Me: What did they do?


Evan: The Mommy Snake and the three Snakes went to Halloween.  And the Mommy Snake and the three Snakes went to a Halloween castle.  And they knocked.  And Daddy opened the door and said, “Happy Halloween, Mommy –“


Me: That was a good story.


Evan: “and Happy Halloween, Snakes!  Have some candy!”  Then they all had candy!  The End!


Me: That was a very good story, Evan.  Try the rice; you like rice.