It might surprise to know that I’m not big on Valentine’s Day. Especially those damn card exchanges. Who are these brilliant moms who have it all together to do homemade, themed valentines for a class of 22? (or 25? or 35?) You know the kind. Their valentines always have candy, some cute, slightly funny saying, and perhaps a toy and sticker. And it all goes together! It’s all ridiculously cute. While I know where they get there ideas, I don’t have the bloody time.
This is a huge problem for the rest of us. And by the rest of us, I mean me. I buy my cards. I let the boys pick out what they want. And we just do cards. I’m not cool with plopping down 10 bucks a class just so my kid has “The Coolest Card Ever.” Besides I know it’s going to be topped by one of those moms any ways. Besides I’m a mean old mom who is going to make my kids sit down and do every valentine. I can’t imagine the chaos that would ensue if I made them do a craft for each kid.
Then on top of all this crafty loveliness, these moms are setting their daughters (because nine times out of ten it’s the girls) for Valentine Day disappointment in the future ahead. Valentine’s Day already appeals to girls. It’s pink with hearts and the only weapon is being held by a little baby that reminds boys eerily of their own baby brother who wouldn’t let them have the weapon either. The Valentine’s cards they pick out have Sith Lords or weapons or cars or superheroes. There is a darkness that appeals to them. Apparently the word “love” makes boys break out into gagging. Valentine girl cards aren’t dark. (Except the Twilight ones; those kids look depressed, not in love, just horribly, terribly depressed.) Valentine’s Day is not on the boy radar. It takes years of coaching for that, and why would you set a girl up for that chore?
I think we need to cool it with the Valentine cards. Save the cute, craftiness for the girl friends. They’ll love it and appreciate it. It’s time we taught our daughters it’s a girl holiday to celebrate friendships. Channel their energy into giving fun, cute elaborate gifts to their girl friends who will love and appreciate it. Unlike . . the . . . boys.
I have boys! I have three boys! And I have to turn them into the Good Guys. Which means, they have to understand that even if their girlfriends say it’s not a big deal, it is. Because girls are all spoon-fed this romantic stuff since the cradle. Deep down, all girls are romantic. (I swear I will deny it if you ask me.) Ok, new plan for my house. Valentine’s Day will become a big deal with cute, thoughtful homemade cards. Starting next year.
I wish I had girls.